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OOUMTY
» a
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IK
“Onr Ambition is io make a Yeracions Work, Reliable in its * \ Candid in its Conclusions, and dost in its Yieis."
Statements,
VOL. I.
A wealthy Frenchman who has a hatred
of sharks has been cruising in a steam
vessel for a year passed and killed over
3 000 of the monsters. When he began
work in the harbor of Havana the au
thorities warned him off.
The Sioux Reservation, one-half of
which it is proposed to open up to set
tlers, contains an area of 37,000 square
miles. That is to say, it is larger than
the State of Kentucky, and only a few
square miles smaller than the State of
Indiana.
During the last famine in China it re
quired fifteen days to transport relief to
the people over a distance of 200 miles.
Contrast with that the fact that at tho
time of the big Chicago fire iu 1371, a
relief train from New York traveled
1,500 miles in 21 hours.
There is a considerable increase in the
force of Protestaut missionaries in Mex
ico. The results thus far are anything
but discouraging. With only about a
hundred ordained missionaries upward
of 350 congregations have been organ
ized, with 18,000 church members and
35,000 adherents.
A little girl of Metz, Alsace, 14 years
old, named Louise Fuchs, has been con
demned to eight days’ imprisonment for
having insulted the Emperor of Ger
many. The insult consisted in writing a
private letter to one of her little friends,
in which there was something disrespect
ful to his majesty. Such sentences are
said to be quite common in Alsace-Lor
raine.
It has been calculated that the quan
tity of beer brewed yearly in the under
mentioned countries is about as follows:
Great Britain, 1,050,000,000 gallons;
Germany, 000,000,000; Austria, 270,000,
000;BeIgium, 1,30,000,000; France, 150,
000,000; Russia, 50,000,000: Holknc,
33,000,000; Denmark, 30,000,000; Swe
den, 30,000,000; Switzerland, 17,000,
030; Norway, 16,500,000.
Frederick Ellison, who was appointed
i(«nsuV to the Island of St. Helena, by
President Cleveland, lias handed in his
resignation of the position, and returned
to his home in Indianapolis, Ind. He
says that St. Helena is so dismal that he
wonders that Napoleon survived so long
as he did his exile on that dreary rock.
Air. Ellison landed on the island at night,
llad he reached it in the daytime he
says hs would never have gone ashore.
A Government agent traveling in
Alaska says that the American citizens
in some porlions of that country still
pray for tl o E nperor of Russia. In one
town only one man was found who
knew the name of an American city, and
that was San Francisco. The rcpoit
says: “After laboring with them one
man was found who had somehow heard
of Chicago. Boston, New York, Phila
delphia and Washington were unknown
regions.
_
At the close of the war there were
only forty-eight miles of railroad in the
State of Arkansas. In 1874 there were
only about 700 miles. Now, there are
near 2,000 miles, and as many more miles
projected on the different lines, which
will be built ere long, some of
which are in course of construction.
Soon our State, says the Arkansas
Traveler, will be checkered by these
pioneers and indispensable adjuncts of
civilization.
This is a great country, remarks the
New York Sun. A photograph taken in
Los Angeles, Cal., of the servants of an
American lady living there shows six
persons. On a wheelbarrow, trying hard
to keep from giggling, are two pretty
maids, one Welsh, the other Scotch.
Behind them stand the colored cook, in
cap and apron; the Mexican gardener,
the English groom, and the Chinese
waiter man. The mistress call3 the
gathering a “Congress of Nations.”
The efficiency of oil, when dropped
upon the water to calm boisterous waves
may now be regarded as established. It
is astonishing how small a quantity of
oil will answer the purpose. Admiral
Clone gives the amount as from two to
three quarts an hour dropped from per
forated bags hanging over tho sides of
the ship in positions varying with the
wind. The oil, then, by its own out
spreading, extending over the waves,
forms a film of less than a two and a half
millionth part of an inch iu thickness;
and this is enough to reduce breaking
waves and dangerous “rollers” to un
broken undulations that are practically
harmless. The oils that have been found
most effective are seal, porpoise, and fish
nils. Mineral oils, such as are used for
illumination, are too light; but the lu
bricating oils are denser, and may be
found sufficient.
STATION, GEORGIA, SATURDAY, APRIL 21, 1888-
LIGHT AND SHADOW.
No light e’er shines without its shadow casting
A gloom as deep and dark, the other way.
No earthly beam can make its force so lastin'*,
But that the night may shroud its fading
-
ray.
No human joy without its shaded sorrow,
To spread as wide and deep its withering
Wight;
The fullest pleasures tinges often borrow
From coming grief which darkens like the
night.
No sounds of laughter with their echoes wak
ing
The sunlight air in surges of delight,
But there are moans to show that hearts are
breaking,
As if tho transient foliy to requite.
The chandelier can never m . its . glowing
out iw th!t'« tnat tne th tallow f * plen ^ dip orof is faintly the halls showing of pride,
The ghastly squalor where the poor reside,
Atthe first dawn of tho creation
a8Swa J
Here though tho shades their sombre palls
are easting,
We should not droop or falter thro’despair.
Here though the frosts the sweetest tu ts
are blasting,
Their shadows come not, not for toi no no lie-tit light is is
there
—Providence Journal.
GMDMOTHER’S SIGNS
By j. t. harbour.
w vve were all very glad when Grand
mother Ryder came to live at our house.
!”y mother smother, and one of
tne Dcst-mtentioned little old women in
the world. When grandfather died, my
orotneis ana sisters, as well as myself,
erearraia tnatgiundmother would make
!' 1 10 J{ ie a *’ our Ancle Nat’s or at our
Auut Marys, and there was great re
joicmg -when the letter came in which
she wrote:
1 aid think at first that I’d better go
to Mary s, but the grounds in my coffee
cup never pointed favorably to it, and
last night 1 had a dream that I’ve dremp
luce times running, that made it clear to
my mind that 1 d better come to you. I
would start to-morrow if it wasn’t Fri
day, and I sometimes think the Friday
sign not start runs until into Monday, Saturday, too; so 1 wid
which will bring
me to your house on the day the moon
fulls, and I take that to be a good sign.”
Au amused smile came into father’s
face as read this letter aloud to us chil
dren, and he burst out laughing when I
sald i,.
I d J list , like to , know what coffee set
tlings and dreams and the moon have to
do y'jD |
said “Nothing, my dear; nothing at all,”
mother, laughing softly. “But
grandmother need has odd notions that wc
all, when not say she anything is about, or mind at
here.”
We lived in the country on a splendid
farm. On the next Wednesday afternoon,
to our great delight, we saw‘father driv
ing up the long lane leading to our house,
with Grandmother Kyder seated on the
spring She seat by his side.
waved her handerchief, and six
eager children set ott on a run to meet
her. IV3 had not seen her for three
years,anel as soon as we were near enough
to hear she began saying:
grovved “Why, bless my soul, how you have
! 1 declare 1 don’t know totlier
from which, but I guess that's Bertie,
and that little girl with the ruffled apron
is Mamie, and that’s Tommy with the
red ribbon to his neck. Looks ’zactly
like the anibrotype of him I’ve got.
Bless all your little hearts, anyhow!
J’ll know which is which ’fore two
hours.”
When father helped her out of the
wagon she struck her foot on something,
and would have fallen had he not caught
her.
“Mercy on us!” she said. “I'm glad I
stubbed my right toe. If it had been
the left it’d been a sure sign I was going
where I wasn’t wanted.”
“You know that yon arc wanted here,
no matter what the signs say,” said
mother, as she took grandma into her
arms and kissed her many times.
“Yes, dear, I know it, I know it,”
said gmudma; “but all the same, I
couldn’t have helped worryin’some if it
had been the left toe.”
We soon discovered that grandmother
had a signforeverythingthat happened,
am! for much that didn't happen. When
anything detily unusual occurred giandmasud
recalled something in the manner
in which she had previously been fore
warned of it. The fact that her signs
and predictions generally failed of fulfil
ment did not disturb her in theleast.
One day I overheard mother say:
“Don’t you often notice, grandma, that
your signs do not come true? You said
yesterday when you saw the eat scratch
ing the fence, that it would rain, sure,
before night; but there was not a cloud
in the sky all day, and not a drop of rain
fell.”
“IVhy, Susan.”’ surprise. cried grandma, “The in a
tone of great morning
paper says there was s perfect flood yes
terday in Alabama.”
The proof was incontrovertible, not
withstanding hundred the fact that Alabama was
fiteen miles from our home.
My youngest brother was but three
months old when grandma became a
member of our family. She was very
fond of baby Danny, and was gratified
to know that the signs she had had re
garding him were favorable to his future
happiness. "If he lives up.” she said,
to grow
“he’ll be a smart and a rich man. See
that mole on his neck. That’s a splen
did sign. And he’s going to have a
‘cow-lick’too; that’s another good sign,
I hope to goodness, Susan, that you
haven’t allowed him to look in a look
mg-giass yet.
"! don't know, I’m sure,” said
‘' Vh3 ’’ Susan,’ cried grandma, “he
must not see himself m the glass until
his first birthday! You’ll never raise him
if he does. I’m glad he’s already tumbled
out of bed; it’s a sure sign he’ll never be
a fool.”
Grandmother's signs and omens were a
®° urce °f uneasiness to herself only,
Mother early took occasion, privately,
to instruct us older children on the sub
ject. She told us dreams had no mean
ing, and that “signs” were silly and
meaningless she said, invention?. We were not,
to mind what grandma said, but
were to love and respect her under all
circumstances.
whom Baby Dan was a winning little fellow,
we all loved so dearly that we were
glad grandma’s omens did' not portend
anything did disastrous to him, even though
we not believe in signs. But one
day grandma came down to breakfast
awas*
“ I hope this whole family may keep
as well for a year to come as I am now,”
she said, mysteriously.
Baby Daa sat in his high chair by
g ra 'idma’s side, and in the midst of the
j morning knife meal fork, she suddenly her dropped around her
and threw arms
lh e baby, and burst into tears,
“ Whv, in grandma, what is it? ” cried
mother real alarm.
“Boor little dear,” she cried; “he
ain’t, long for this world! I’ve dreamed
three nights of white colts. I tohl you,
Susan, wliat'd happen if you cut his toe-
1 nails of a Sunday, or let the other
children raise your parasol in the house.
\ told you!”
Grandma’s distress was so evident that
none of us feltlike laughing, and mother
said:
“Don’t worry, mother. You know
that all signs fail at times.”
“Mine don’t,” said grandma in atone
of deep conviction. “And as 1 was lay
ing in bed this morning, a little bird flew
in at the window and what” lighted on my
bedpost. I know that means,
Susan. Danny ain’t going to be here very
long; you’ll see that lie isn’t. And off the
worst of it is that lie’ll be took sud
den, and in some uncommon way.”
No reasoning could shake grand
mother's conviction in the least, and her
continued depression and gloomy predic
tions made us all very uncomfortable,
Indeed, so strong children is a'superstition
not one of us could help look
ing'upon dear little'Drill as a doomed
child in spite of mother’s arguments to
the contrary
Grand molher had other unfailing signs
indicating Danny's early demise. day, A
white kitten came to the door one
and grandma shook her head gloomily.
“But I have always heard that was a
of good luck to father. have a kitten come
to the house,” said
“Not a white k tten,” replied Grand
ma. “A black or gray kitten is a good
sign but a white one is a sign of”—
She stooped over caught Danny up in
her arms, and hastily left the room.
An old white rooster that we had,
crowed on the doorstep that day, and
grandma ordered his instant execution
as tho only means of averting his share
of the di.s'aster threatening Danny.
Grandma’s signs multiplied fast, charac- and
were of a positive, never-failing
ter. She came down to breakfast one
beautiful Juno morning, bowed flown
with tho dreadful conviction that the
end would come that very day.
Danny’s condition did not warrant an
expectation of death from disease, at all
events, lie seemed to be snapping his
little pink lingers at all kinds of signs as
he lay in his cradle, kicking up his heels
and crowing gleefully. He was almost
a year old at this time, and grandma
had said <hat lie would never live to see
his first birthday.
During the forenoon we were visited
by several of our relatives who had
driven a distance of ten miles to spend
the dav at our house. AVe were delighted
to see them and gave ourselves up to a
day of enjoyment. Even grandma joined
in our pleasure, seeming to forget her
doleful prophecies of what the day would
bring forth. which the
After dinner, was great
event of the day, the entire family, with
the exception of grandma and baby Dan,
strolled out into the orchard with our
visitors. From the orchard ws went on
over a narrow bit ef meadow land in
search of wild strawberries, vhieh were
abundant.
Then we went up a grassy Hillside and
into a little grove of oaks and elms,
There we all sat down on thi grass and
enjoyed what we called “areal so cable
time,” until father, bethought him t 0
look at his watch, and said:
“Why, it’s nearly fouro clock. AVe
have been away three Hours. Danny
will have quite worn him. graidmother out
with the care of We must hurry
home.”
When we reached the louse we found
grandma fast asleep lock in ler #f her rocking-chair
blown on the pia'/.a, her a face bf the June gray wind, hair
over
and her wrinkled hanis crossed peace
fully in the sunshine tlat fell across her
lap. She heard our tootsteps and was
awake in an instant.
“Where possible is Danny?'asked the mother.
“It isn’t that he has slept ail
this time.”
"I guess he has,’said grandma; “I
haint heard a sound from him.”
Mother which stepped hurriedly always into the
room in Daniy took his
noonday nap. Sh<came out instantly,
quite pale, and saving, in a trembling
voice: “He isn’t tpere; he’s gone!’’
“What -did—y«u—say, risirg her fee' Susan? ’ asked
grandmother painfulpeliberatioD. to ami speak
ing with
“He’s gone!” «id mother again.
Grandmother r ive a low moan, sank
back in herehai 1 . and said solemnly: “I
knew it would tc so. You laughed at
my R 'gns, Susan. You wouldn’t hear
to them. I feel in my bones that Danny
Bertram will never be seen again on this
earth. The signs don’t fail me.”
I remember that I set up a dreadful
howl, in which I was joined by my
brothers and sisters. Father and our
friends began an immediate and (hor
ough search for Danny, but «o trace of
him could he found.
Grandmother encouraged us by saying,
from time to time, between her broken
sobs: “It’s no use to hunt for him. He’s
tr ine. He’ll never be seen again on this
earth.”
Mother broke down entirely after a
short time, and lay crying on a lounge.
with one of my minis bathing her tem
pies We and looked talking soothingly to her.
the little everywhere—in places that
feet could never have strayed
into.
"l„ the highest and tho lowest and the lone
liest spot.
They not eagerly ’” sought, but they found him
,
Aon * *-.* .«> ,*»
t seem possible that —
od grandmother. a ' n I possible, David,’’ interrupt
"I’m satisfied that I
hadn't been asleep ten minutes when
y° u ,0 lks came home, and 1 know that
110 Hnc w' as near the house before you
came. No, no, David, human hands
never touched our Danny. I didn’t
oream of white colts with four wings
apiece, .“What for nothing.” would
on earth colts of any
kind want with Danny?” asked one of
n *y aunts.
J ^ n hour and more pnssed, nud Danny
was not found. We hurried to the near
cs *- neighbors. They had not seen any
suspicious characters in the noighbor
hood, aud knew nothing about Danny’s
disappearance. They full came to our house
m great numbers, of sympathy and
barrowing reminiscenses of similar dia
appearances in which the missing chit
dreu were either found dead or were
never found at all.
The evening drew on. The sun went
, Mother had said and
aown - over over
again that we must find her baby bet', re
night came on. She could not endure
the tlia thought darkness of having Father him away when
and his came. began to
grow pail voice trembled when
bespoke.
Parties of men and boys were search
. the neighboring woods and planning
"D
,! ml ’ drag the streams. sitting, tearfuland It was nearly dark,
!‘ we were anxious,
N "'other’s room, when we heard a loud
ekiuinotion outside,
1,1 a moment the door was thrown open
and thcl '-‘ stood our big, jolly Uncle
Darius Bertram, and, high on his slmul
dpr > laughing and making a desperate
effort, to talk, sat--I)anny!
‘such a time and nobody to it.
,aid . Uncle Darius, he put Danny into
as
m otDor s outstretched arms.
° Darius! where did you find him?”
cried . mother.
“Hound him lying in lus bed about
, half-past three tins afternoon. My wife
at >d 1 were driving into town and called
hereto see you, but found no one at
home but grandmother and baby. Grand
mother was asleep and baby seemed to
kicking j K! having up a his lonely heels sort in Ins of crad time c. of ho it
) vlfu and I thought we’d take him out
'°r an hiring, the day being so hnc. I
wrote a little note on a leaf of my pocket
<d ' ir y.’ telling you we had him. Didn’t
you find it?”
sald father; “where did you
,.,,4 I pinned . it to baby s pillow,
“,, u ^ J- I know wife said for me to.
Dot I in such a forgetful fellow that I
1 ort f know really where I dizl put that
It was written on a small leaf like
this- He diew out li.s pocket-diary as
} lp spoke, opened it and sat down look
bigycryfoolish. 'Veil, I swan!” he said; “of I didn’t
p ' can forget to tear the note after I’d
wrl D® n ,l - I must be getting loony.
‘V\ c were detained in thevillagemuch
[oaga 1 ' Gian wo expected, said Aunt
Harriet, l ncle Darius s wife; ‘ and I was
afraid you would worry about bahy, but
he has been just as good as he could be,
and be seemedtoenyoy the ride so very
much ' 1 co,,1,ln1 ,lnd bis cloak to put
<m h[ n n but I had a light shawl with me,
and A found his little ever-day sunbon
out m tne yard. It, was good enough
!°,' vca !' 1 °.think of the anxiety the
‘dtle chap s ride lias cost you.
Grandmother vras down on her knees
over Danny, and ol course not
on « sa,d a word to her abo “ t th ? se
aafulfiiled omens, ft was months be
fore the woids “sjg ns and omens
P ast j® d * iar “P 3 - 1 hen she spoke of them
though they were things beneath her
I hey certainly had no power over
Danny, for I have often heard himrell
n „o l "is story to his own children.-—
f"nth'a Oomj.uuion.
—----- ---- --
Some ‘ English Pronunciations.
Talbot is pronounced Tolbut.
r Bui l hames is is pronounced pronounced Buller. Terns.
wer
Cowper Holburn is pronounced Cooper. Ilobun.
is pronounced
AVemyss is pronounced AVeems.
Cock Kuollys is prodouneed prounounced Knowles.
burn is Coburn.
Norwich Brougham is pronounced Norridge. Broom.
St. I.eger is is pronounced Sillinger.
Hawarden is pronounced pronounced Harden.
Colquhoun Cirencester is pronounced pronounced Cohoon.
is Sissister.
Grosvenor Salisbury is is pronounced pronounced Grovenor. Sawlsbury.
Marylebone Beauchamp is pronounced pronounced Beceham. Marrabun.
is
Abergavenny is pronounced Aber
genny.
Marjoribanks is pronounced March
banks.
brooks. Bolingbrokc is pronounced Bulling-
WORDS OK WISDOM.
Our greatest evils come from ourselves.
The fish that gets away always looks
as big as the sea serpent.
Crafty men condemn studies, simple
men admire them, and wise men use
them.
Tho only failure a man ought to fear
is failure in cleaving to the purpose he
secs to lie best.
Good sense and good nature are never
separated, though the ignorant world
has thought otherwise.
He that would live clear of envy must
lay his finger on his mouth, and keep
his baud out of the inkpot.
There is something in resolution which
has an influence beyond itself; all is
prostration where it appears.
There is always hope in a man that
actually and earnestly works. In idle
ness alone there is perpetual despair.
To be a gentleman does not depend
upon the tailor or the toilet. Good man
ners count, for more than good clothes.
Confidence of success is almost s icco^s:
and obstacles often fall of themselves be
fore a determination to overcome them.
Let not your recreations be lavish
spenders of yurr time, hut choose such
as are healthful, recreative, and apt to
refresh you; but at no hand dwell upon
them.
The cares which are the keys of riches,
hang often so heavily at the rich man’s
girdle, that they clog him with weary
days and restle-s nights, when others
sleep quietly.
The lightsome passion of joy was not
that which now usurps the name; that,
trivial, vanishing, superficial thing that
only giids the apprehensions and plays
upon the surface of the soul.
Every man is a debtor to iiis profes
sion; from the which as men of course
do seek to receive countenance and profit,
so ought they of duty to endeavor them
selves, hy way of amends, to be a help
and ornament thereto.
Discontent is like ink poured into
water, which lilies the whole fountain
full of blackness, it casts a cloud over
the mind, the evil and which renders disquiets it more occupied than
about it,
about the means of removing it.
Every point in which a man excels,
every true virtue which he cherishes,
every good habit which he acquires,
every beauty of spirity to which lie at
tains, will make his friendship purer,
stronger, and better worth having.
Beware, my son, of the man
dreary platitudes are never
by the celestial glow of lmmor.
wise it may happen Hint your otvn
will become as dry and dusty ns his.
Such a mail may lie as wise as Solomon,
possibly. But the chances are that he
an ass.
Very Rich Englishmen.
Tho biggest income of any man in
England is said to be that of the Duke
of Westminster, who has miles of tene
ment houses and many square miles of
agricultural land, lie is said to receive
$.>0 a minute the year round, or $3,000
an hour, or $72,000 a day. Ruoen
Victoria lias also a nice income, and it is
estimated that she has received nearly
one hundred millions of dollars since
she ascended the throne '111" Dal es of
Devonshire and Norfolk and the .Marquis
of Bute, have each rents amounting to
$2,000,000 per year, and ihc Duke of
Portland, alter oxtravagoneo like those
of Monto Cristo. accumulated $10,000.
000 of The unentailed of England property is during largely his
life. tax an
income tax, and it is possible to letl
something of the fortunes of her citizens
from the amount of income returned.
Of course this is always less than the
real amount received. Still it, makes
one’s eyes open to know that, Lord Dur
ham owns ^-1 1.000,000 of 1’ortland personal prop
erty, that, the Duke of gels a
million a year from his real estate alone,
and that the two largest, returns of per
sonal prope ty were made by men who
do not belong railroad to the nobility. Mr.
Grassy, a contractor, acknowl
edged to having $20,000,000 personally,
and Mr. Morrison, a dry goods man,
$20,000,000. Lord Dudley, one of ihe
had large owners of income England’s coal $5,000,* mines,
for years an of over
0Ml from this source alone, and the Duke
of Buecleuch gets $1.130,000 a yearfrom
his lands. In 1872 there were more than
1,500 men in England who had income*
of over $25,000 a year, and there were
857 men who had incomes ranging be
tween $50,000 and a quarter of a million
yearly. It is said that I here are more
large fortunes in the United States than
in England and that the English million
aires spend their incomes more freely
than do the Americans .—Pitslurg D m
patch.
New Economical Plants.
The Directors of the Sibanimpur Oar
dens, India, are acclimatization. cultivating a number of
new plants, is the lor Acacia Senegal, which, Among
them be
sides yielding ilie best gum a: aide, lur
nishes a reddish-brown wood,” which
takes on a fine polish, and is used for
weavers’shuttles. Thu Cedilla adoiata,
or West Indian cedar, has a light wood
of a mahogany color, even-grained,easily
worked, and fragrant the wood from
which Havana cigar-boxes are made.
Ccnchcris catharticus is a much valued
fodder-plant, which grows in sandy
desert tracts. It is the Tuart of Austra
lia, a tree of magnificent proportions,
which furnishes most excellent hard
wood timber. Tho Myricaq or wax
myrtles, of North and South America,
are cultivated for the waxy exudations
on their fruits, from which the wax
is separated hy boiling Napindus and skimming.
The fruits of the saponaria, or
W est Indian soap-berry, contain a large
quantity is used for of washing a saponaceous clothes. matter, The which hard,
round, black seeds are worn as beds for
necklaces .—Popular Ncienre Monthly.
NO. 24.
BEADING THE MILESTONE.
I stopped to road the Milestone here,
A laggard sohool-boy, long ago;
I came not far—my homo vras near—
But oh, how far I longed to got
Behold a number and a. name—
A (Inger, Westward, cut in stone;
The vision of a city came,
Across the dust and distance shown.
Around me lay the farms asleep
In hazes of autumnal air,
And sounds that quiet loves to keep
Were heard, and heard not, everywhere.
I read the Milestone, day by day;
I yearned to cross the barren bound,
To know the golden Far-away,
To walk the new Enchanted Ground!
—Dim. Piatt
PITH AND POINT.
“ Precious green ”—the emerald.
An object of charity—to do good, of
course.
Cupid is always shooting and forever
making Mrs,
This cold snap is accounted for. A
quicksilver trust lias been formed, and
of course mercury went up. —Pittsburg
Chronicle. ,
If Dakota cannot get into the Union
she can enjoy the satisfaction of making
it decidedly chilly for the States that
are in.— Graphic.
A house painter who slipped his from paint- a
staging the other day, carrying it stated, with
pots with him, came oil, is
flying colors.— Life.
A collecting agency in New York is
run by women exclusively, which seems
to disprove the adage, a woman's work
is never dun.— Sittings. ■
Some of our eontcniporics are remark
ing that in Kansas there is a postoftice
named “/,'ero.” Well, what of it? That
is nothing .—Dowell Courier.
l ady of the house -“.lane, who is that
girl that just left the kitchen? Jane—
“Oh, ma’am! that s the Indy what works
for the. woman across the street.
Pater Kamillas—"1 can’t watch. imagine what
is the matter with mv It must
need cleaning.” Hobby—“Oh, no, it
don’t papa. Baby and mo had it in the
wasli ba»in all the morning aud got it
quite clean.”
Everybody in the church, except the
new pastor himself, seemed to enjoy it
when he lost the place in his manuscript,
and while hunting for it spok of “Esau,
who sold his message for a birth of pot
right. —IlurGu ihm Jliwknyr.
Some tobacconists ones dwelt in town,
To modesty <liey’d gained pipes, renown; ’Us dear,
"We do not pair our
We do not puli' cigars sold here.”
You see they were it brace ol jokers
And left the “putting” to the smokers.
—New York Nun.
“There’s a great difference between an
egg and a riding horse,” remarked the
Mmke Editor. “1 suppose what so,” difference replied
the Ilorse Editor; but “An
doyoureferto in particular?” it’s addled.”— Pdts- egg
is of no use when
burg Chronicle.
There is nothing that goes further
toward breaking the heart of a post
mistress who doesn’t understand anything
but English than to have the mail contain
a postal card written in a feminine hand
in German and addressed to a young man
whom site knows.
(inert at Country Tavern —“Have you
any cheese, landlord?” I.andlord—“Not
a bit in the house, sir.” Guest—"Not
even a little piece?” Landlord—“By
gum, there is, come to thiuk! Pete,
run down cellar and fetch up that rat
trap .”—Del roil Free Prom.
There are shrewd, careful men in this
country who are bound to crowd the
weak to the wall. One of them bought
Horace Greeley’s autograph at a sale the
other day, and within half an hour bull
dozed a Chinese laundryman into deliver
ing six shirts and a dozen collars for it.
The bell he swung is silent now,
His emery wheels revolve no more;
The s ol of rest, is on tlmt lu ow
Henceforth Thut; long coroBileop cut furrows i knives wore;
our scissors an our
No more in him a frioml we’ll lives find,
His was one of those toilsome
That proved in fact a ‘’horrid grind.” Unilgnt.
—Boston
Perkins—“And so you’re going to the
fancy-dress wear?” ball ? Smart What costume Alee—“I are think you
going I'll to suit and
borrow your summer go as
a tramp. What are I’ll you going to wear?” di
Perkins-—“I guess put on your
agonal Prince Albert and go as a looking
glass.
Scared Grizzles.
J. if. Inman, a former fur contracting
agent of the Hudson’s Bay Company,
said to a New York Nun reporter:
will “While majority 1 believe that a grizzly hear
in a of cares wait for a
fight with a man and take pains to get
ill the way of one, there are times when
it will seetn to think better of it and
back out A remarkable instance of this
kind I heard of once, where a famous
Manitoba guide courageously advanced
upon three grizzlies, an old she one and
two half-grown young bears, and by a
series of ridiculous monkey-shines and
acrobatic maneuvers on the ground with
in a rod or two of the bears filled them
with such astonishment and apparent
fear shat the three retreated into tho
woods with all rapidity. The guide’s
gun had snapped in both barrels, Jic hav
ing diawn on the old bear before tho
young ones appeared. desperation He afterward said
that it was in a lit of that be
trie I the turning of a handspring and
.lumping bauds, and up and down, flotiping his
resorting Had to other unhuntcr-
1 ike measures. He been told once
that a hunter had frightened a mountain
lion away by similar absurd movements,
and he found that it worked to perfection
in the case of the hears, although he did
not grizzlies encourage armed with anyone nothing to go hunting than
more
a capasity to turn somersaults,”